My First Sweetheart

I met Gabe at a religious youth group thingy. I wasn't religious but my friends were and their parents made me go to church with them on Sundays (If I were to remain their friend). Many people in town described me as a heathen with hippies for parents. Both were/are true.

Gabe and I were really just boyfriend and girlfriend in name only. He lived in McCloud and I lived in Dunsmuir. We would talk on the phone every night and we even kissed when we saw each other. I was way too shy to be having sex at 13, so we didn't try any of that serious stuff. He ended marrying the girl he dated right after me. Then he left that girl for another one. He ended up killing that third one. And here's his latest...his plea.

For Example

Now, this is what daddio was talking about. A man and his flag after war. Go America. Fuck Yeah!

Nothing to say but, "nothing"

Last night I dreamt about tall jockeys. African ones. I think that it might be a mixture of my blog photo of a tall African jockey and Prager talking about Africa so much last night. Sometimes I dream about midgets too.

So, my house obviously is making me a little crazy, but I love living with so many people. It reminds me of being 19 or 20 or 21 or 24 again. Right now I have Prager, Sherry, Yoshi, Johnny Jr. and my sister. My parents refer to me as an "earth mother," but that is hippie mentality for you. My dad said "kick them all out of the pool before you have to beat one of them up." And that is why he is also a hippie with anger management issues. So predictable he is. He even tried to convince me that Fox News' coverage of Hurricane Katrina was part of the government's conspiracy to brainwash us against all Muslims. He said that the eye of the storm looked like a holy jihad and in the corner was a flag waving. It looked like the end of the world. In India, says daddio, the Indian Government doesn't even warn those assholes. You hear it all the time - "a village of one thousand was swept away today"- and nobody cares because there are too many frickin people there. They are happy to lose as many as they can. But in the US of A, Fox makes the weather patterns look like war or a reason to go to war. What the hell happened to this country? But that is a hippie with anger management issues who is also a conspiracy theorist for you.
How many people have perished in our hurricane war today?

Britpop returns

I'm only posting this because I was and am a huge fan of Britpop. I miss Blur and Pulp and Suede. In fact, I am still in love with Damon Albarn....I'm sure that many of you know that. I was once invited to his birthday party in London. I didn't make it. --back to the posting-- It looks like Emily is bringing back a little Popscene for us hasbeens. I may or may not see you there. Depends how I am feeling that night.

Bottom of the Hill Lessons for Free

I was checking out the Bottom of the Hill website and came across the Bookings section. I was really impressed by their advice. Read this. Apparently, they know everything about everything.

From the Monkey's Mouth

"Don't miss this show you Dick!!! Sean Rawl's last show before he moves to Ecuador !!! Adios Mr.Sean, Dios mio! ¡Hay un hacha en mi cabeza! !!!

Still Flyin' with
New England Roses ( JD from Le Tigre's band)
K.I.T
Paradise Island
at Bottom of the Hill All Ages Friday, September 2 10:00 PM (8:30 PM doors) U.S.$8.00 http://www.ticketweb.com/user/?region=sfbay&query=detail&event=614756
http://www.myspace.com/stillflyin


"Still Flyin's We are better now: live for the very first time released by Nokohoma Records is the gem of the year so far. I have never heard a debut recording that has shown more immediate potential and clarity in it's vision since stumbling on Talking Heads:77".
-- Robert Christgau, Village Voice 05.14.05 "

And---> Hey Willpower is playing at the Rickshaw Stop on Sept 1.

I Highly Recommend...

the movie The 40 Year Old Virgin.

I laughed.

Thanks Fay for the Cheer-up!

http://www.stuffonmycat.com/

everyone else has a blog, so i should too

My friend sarah has a blog. Now we can be bloggin buddies. i don't know what that means, but i'll read hers.

everyone else has a blog, so i should too

Nintendogs.com

http://nintendogs.com/

Lydia's Photos-- her trip to SF plus some others.

PS- Alex's band is playing on Thursday

HotDogCanada- i miss my friends/

HotDogCanada

Prison Review

I went to see my brother yesterday. He was moved from the California State Prison, Solano to the Correctional Medical Facility in Vacaville. These facilities are about a half a mile apart...yet worlds apart.

The first prison was really clean and newish. The prisoners ranged from husbands to sons and were visited by full families in their "Sunday best." Going to visit my- then sane- brother was actually kind of nice. We would have lunch and talk about things he had seen on TV and even planned on starting a regular weekend chess game. I was feeling a little better about him being locked up. He told me that he was ok.

Well, that all changed within a month. He stopped taking his medicine, and as a result, was transferred to an institution that could provide him with proper care. This was done through my parents and a PR agent of the California Prison System. I was a little weary about this new place. I recently read that an inmate had died at the facility due to improper medical care, but I hoped that my brother wouldn't suffer the same fate. Actually, I knew he wouldn't. He has a mental illness and not a physical one. At least for that I was thankful.

So, this past Sunday, my mom, my sis, and myself drive the 50 minute drive to CMF (Correctional Medical Facility). We arrived at about 11:30am. It was clear upon arrival that this prison was very different than the last one. Although the exterior was the same, it had a ghostlike quality to it. I didn't see a lot of visitors and it was quick to get in. At the other prison, processing can take up to 3 hours. At CMF, it was about 30 minutes.

Once inside the prison walls, we were surrounded by other inmates and their visitors while we waited for Robert. We were a little afraid that my brother wouldn't respond to the announcement that he had guests. In fact, we didn't know what to expect. It had been 5 months since we last heard from him and in that time, he had lost his Appeal for a lesser sentence. His case is up for Appeal again, but I'm not sure if it will be successful.

So, how do I describe the "inside"? Shit. I don't know. It was all kinda horrible. Did you know that inmates can't even smoke in California prisons now? They (the powers that be) took away their books and now their smokes. What do you even gamble with or barter with? Toothpicks?

The prisoners in CMF look sick. I mean like Charles Manson sick. I was very very disturbed. Uncomfortable even looking up from my group.

When my brother finally came out to greet us, it was like he didn't even know who we were. He kept far away from us and only allowed us to hug him for half a second each, but with the understanding that we weren't allowed to hold him tight. After the hug, he made us promise that we would stay far away from him, to give him his space. We agreed. We were just happy to see him.

Physically, he looked great. He has dropped 90 pounds in the last 5 months. Once 240, he is down to his normal 150. His skin, his teeth, and his clothing were all clean. For that, I am grateful.

Mentally, however, he is gone. Sometimes I see a little bit of the old Robert in a single glance, a word, or even a smile. Other times...I can only describe it as alien. It breaks my heart.

For once, I was happy to be on meds. Happy that I was the only one NOT crying (besides my brother). We sat there and I laughed and he laughed and few words were exchanged. With the money we brought into the prison, we bought him some Hot Pockets and 5 Coca-Colas. He seemed to appreciate that...but I wasn't 100% sure.

I know one thing for certain- he is not taking his medication. I can't tell what I think about that. He seems lost in his own world, completely unaware of his surroundings. Perhaps this is the best state for him. I wouldn't want to be aware of prison either. And, at least he is thinner and looking healthier. That is all that matters, right?

What do I do now? Start believing in God? Praying that he gets better? If there is one, everything I see lately tells me that "God" isn't paying attention.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

The Weird

And, of course, this story is pretty weird:

'MIGHTY MORPHIN' MURDERS?
Former child actor Skylar Deleon, who was an actor on the TV series "Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers," has been accused of brutally murdering a Californian couple by tying them to an anchor and throwing them overboard a yacht.
Deleon, 26, and wife Jennifer, 24, have been ordered to stand trial for the murders of Thomas Hawks and his wife, Jackie, last November in an alleged plot to steal their 55-foot luxury yacht.

The Orange County Superior Court heard Wednesday that the pair posed as interested buyers and demanded a test run off Newport Beach where they attacked the elderly pair with a stun gun before handcuffing and blindfolding them.

They were then allegedly tied to the boat's 66-pound anchor and thrown overboard where they drowned.

Police were alerted to the murder by fellow accomplice Alonso Machain who claims Deleon delayed the planned killings by a week after discovering that Hawks, a retired probation officer from Arizona, was a larger man than first expected.

Matt Murphy, the Deputy District Attorney, says, "It is haunting to think these nice, loving people were trying to hold their breaths as they sank to the bottom of the ocean.

"This is as cold-blooded as it gets."

All the defendants have pleaded not guilty.

Only in SF

Someone or something blew a man's hole.

--i can't take credit for that joke. I stole it.

The Way American Idol Works

So, I finally spoke to my sister. She filled me in on how the American Idol auditions work. First, you get a wristband that allows you to walk up to some booth and sing. The initial auditions are done by section. Her section is coming up. Second, if the person at the booth likes you, you get a "golden ticket" that allows you to perform in front of an Executive Producer. Third, the Executive Producer person decides whether or not you get to audition in front of the Idol Judges.

Now, that makes me wonder how some of those really bad singers make it to the last part. I feel a little ripped off now.

I know. I know. It's a TV show.

Is this for Realz?

http://www.walken2008.com/index.html

and--no word from my sis at american idol. let's pray for her.

One more thing

My friend Paula makes the greatest clothes. We laugh about the fact that I may own her entire Fall collection. But check out her clothes. I am a huge fan and am currently trying to convince her that selling clothes online is the answer to success! I WILL win her over!

The Next American Idol

Right now, as I write this, my sister is at the Cow Palace waiting to be picked to tryout for the next season of American Idol. She got her wristband yesterday and barely made it to the tryouts today.

Woohoo!

Please come and support...

--put on by Mindy.

Dogs Dogs and Coffee

This whole Korea/Dog thing lately is getting to me. Like one big mind fuck. First they are eating them (this article is a must for those who enjoy engrish), then they are cloning them, and then they are hanging out in cafes with them. And the jokes just keep on coming...

Nekkid Neighbor Update

Yesterday they took a picture of us.

Hey does anyone have an ipod that mysteriously turns on every now and then...without anyone touching it?

Yoshi Wisdom, or lack of

"we should trademark "obese soccer" have 20 fat people play , matches should last about 5 minutes."

Vegas Baby

Last month, for Yoshi's birthday, we went to Vegas. Check out our hotel. I fell in love with the gambling lifestyle and fancy digs.

Alert! Ebay Addict Over Here!

Yup. My name is Neshemah and I am an Ebay Addict. Over the last weekend, I have "won" 3 pair of black boots that all look the same. Well, there may be slight variations, but they are hardly noticeable. This is very typical of me. Yesterday, Lydia from London IMed me and told me that in addition to buying many robots from Ebay, she has now bid and won (by negotiating outside of Ebay) a car. So, as an addict, I decided to click on the Ebay Motors link and then "accidentally" applied for Ebay Financing. I am approved for 25k. uh-oh.

And on another note, my BFF, Arianna, may have a new job. Read her email:


puppies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am so fucking excited! i just got wonderful news! i'm being offered a teaching job at goldmiths college in london to lecture on South African history for the autumn term!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! its no teaching assistant rubbish, i am going to run the whole course all by myself!!!!! i'm jumping up and down in my flat screaming like an idiot!!!!!
wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh my god, i am sooooooooooooo happy!!!!!!!!!
love ya all, miss ya all
A. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jay Leno

So, my friend Dan was on Leno last night for his website crying while eating. He got to sit next to Stifler- which was really the coolest part. But poor Dan was actually asked by Jay Leno if he even had a girlfriend. I honestly think that if any of the people I socialize with ended up on Leno, they'd get asked the same question.

Did anyone else get to watch this?

Why doesn't SF get NBC? Isn't this problem fixed yet?

Beisbol, A's Style

Last night, I got to attend my first A's game. I had been told, prior to my trip to the other side of the bay, that the Coliseum is pretty ghetto. Who cares? I am totally familiar with the beautiful, yuppie site of SBC Park. I mean, going to a Giants' game is all about eating good, drinking fancy, microbrew beers and wine, no cursing, no smoking, and definitely, no rowdiness. Sometimes I miss the sight of sport fanaticism. I want to see baseball hooligans. I don't even know if they exist, but when I heard the word ghetto, that is the image I got.

Well, here's my take on an A's game versus a Giants' game:

• A's are amazing this year. Giants are missing Barry Bonds and for some reason that makes the entire team suck?
• 3 dollar Wednesdays at the Coliseum. Why don't the Giants have a special deal like that? Make watching baseball affordable and it makes it even more fun! I mean, come on, haven't you sat in the bleacher seats--I mean cheap seats--at a Giants game? That is were all the action is.
• 1 dollar hotdogs. Yup. That's right. You can buy 10 at a time and that is still about the price of one at SBC park.
• There are young people at the A's games. Amazingly everyone can afford to go!! Imagine that?!
• Tailgating. Since the Giants moved to China Basin, the tailgating option has been cut out. And damn, I forgot how much fun tailgating can be. We watched people shotgunning beers and getting face-painted in preparation for the game.
• The A's have 5 dollar hats and shirts. People are actually selling knock-offs on the bridge between BART and the Coliseum. Since I'm not exactly an A's fan, I decided to jump on the bandwagon and purchase (thanks to wallet of my boy) an A's hat. The Giants don't have this shite. Too many cops or something patrolling the rich peeps. It is amazing what you can get away with at a ghetto stadium.
• The Coliseum. And the view surrounding the sports venue? Industrial nothingness. Actually, it felt very inner-city and prison solid. It rumbled with chanting and screaming and drumming. It was like a literally a bowl of excitement. I loved it.
• The A's beat the Angels. Where's your Disney Magic now?!

I left the A's Coliseum, tipsy, full of food, laughing, and with a little money left in my pocket. I can't wait until I go again.

Help For All Of You Broke Ass NYers

http://www.myopenbar.com/

Willpower and the A's

Yesterday, I went to this art show/fundraiser at The Lab on 16th Street. The reason: Hey Willpower! God those guys are genius. Even with the horrible, crackly speakers. So please go check them out on August 20th at the Independant on Divis. Fun Fun Fun.

And today, thank you very much Selenne, Colin and Deanna, because you got Yoshi and I tickets to the A's. I know, I know, 2 dollar Wednesdays don't seem that exciting. Until you read this: http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2005/08/09/BAGHEE53AV1.DTL

Introducing Mr. Miu Miu Chaplin

Meow Meow

The Neighbor/Real Good TV

This entire summer has been plagued by the enormous lesbo twins across the street from my apartment. I have started to realize, however, that I watch them more than I actually watch TV. 2 nights ago, they were playing dress up (one played man, one played woman) and then they undressed and started making out in the window. I have seen more than I need to. Those chicks have one active sex life...and...they like being watched.



Thanks to Jenny Kang, you can see one of them in the window. Wrong of me to post this? Who gives a shit? It's funny, right?

Why Even Have A PResident

It seems like nothing going on in the world right now is very important to our dear ole President G. Dubya. He's going on vacation again. I am so jealous!!! I wish I were the President of the United States!!

Read here for more.

What Did I Do Last Week?

See Here.

Fried Chicken and Arm Wrestling.

Like Mind Zap...

This festival looks like an imitation of the real thing....but even they admit it.

I might go and check it out.

Is Stoner the new Scenester?

This news article cracked me up

Look at his crazy eyes.

*black star faycat*: Cheer Up Neshy-Poo!

Thank you, Fay.

*black star faycat*: Cheer Up Neshy-Poo!

blagg blogg: No Admitted Hipsters Found at 'Total Hipster Party'

blagg blogg: No Admitted Hipsters Found at 'Total Hipster Party'

I looked at the definition of nerd and saw your face.

thanks yoshi.

Bluegrass Version of Franz Ferdinand

Take me out.